One Man’s Journey: How I Quit Porn and Why I’m Not Going Back

I remember when I first discovered internet porn – I was 17 years old (1).  Fascinated by this world of unleashed sexual expression and fantasy, I couldn’t get enough of it. As I grew up and began exploring my own sexuality, I discovered…
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Should White Male Employee Resource Groups (ERGs) Exist?

Last Friday, I was invited to be a panelist at a LinkedIn Audio event hosted by Raven Solomon entitled “White Male ERGS - Should They Exist?”  Since our session wasn’t recorded (LinkedIn Audio does not yet offer that feature), I’ve…
Photo by Jonas Togo from Pexels
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Embracing Emotions: Showing Up Instead Of Shutting Down

I still remember the exact day. November 14th, 2015. Two friends and I had just finished co-leading a men’s training in the mountains above LA. We had spent the weekend device-free, exploring healthy masculinity with a large group of men.  That…
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Getting Real: Talking About Pornography & Sexuality with Middle School Boys

I was recently invited to facilitate a discussion about pornography and sexuality with a classroom full of 7th grade boys. With this being such an important and rarely-addressed topic for boys at this formative age, I was happy to say yes. Research…
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Beauty in the Breakdown: How a Bike Accident Cracked Open my Heart

A Single Fateful Moment 6:44am - Jan 21st, 2015: Bicycle wheels slice through humid air in the quiet pre-dawn darkness, as I glide down the winding pavement road. Car lights illuminate the faintly falling rain, as the drivers rush past.…
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My Vulnerable Truth: Exploring Masculinity Beneath the Mask

I’ve spent most of my life with a mask on. It’s painful to admit, but it’s true. I’ve worn the mask of numbness in an attempt to protect myself from rejection and disappointment; I’ve worn the mask of superficial satire in an attempt…
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Sacred Masculinity: Learning To Live My Truth As A Wholehearted Man

For many years, I was ashamed of my masculinity. I was deeply disturbed by all the aggression, misogyny, and violence that I saw being perpetrated by men - across many different cultures. It seemed that being a “real man” meant being…
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Courage to Quit: How I’m Outgrowing Pornography and Re-awakening My Sexuality

If you are a human being alive in the 21st century, chances are you have an opinion about porn. Maybe you use it; maybe you don’t. Maybe you think it’s good; maybe you think it’s bad; maybe you think it’s none of my business. Fine.…

Collective Destiny: Poem by Dan Mahle

I don’t know what it’s like to be anyone but me           But I can’t truly know myself until everyone is free I didn’t build this culture of injustice and bigotry          But I receive the benefits of systemic inequitySo…
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Let’s Be Real: From Superficial Interaction to Meaningful Connection

I remember hearing the story of a man who retired after a 30-year office career. He was astonished and saddened to discover that, looking back, it was as if every day was the same. It felt like the past 30 years of his life was only memorable…
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I Love You, Man: 5 Tips for Stepping Into More Mature Masculinity

I grew up never telling anyone that I loved them. Not even my parents. The word “love” used to feel too feminine, too emotional, too vulnerable. As a young man impacted by old masculine norms, there was no room for love in my vocabulary.…